This section covers various 'tips' for men in divorce proceedings at the rabbinical court.
Divorce – Opening Move Where Wife's Behaviour O.K.
Question:
Can a man file for Jewish divorce even if his wife has done nothing terribly wrong but he just doesn't want to stay married to her ?
Answer:
Yes ! Firstly, there is nothing to prevent him filing for divorce at the rabbinical court, although the plea is likely to be rejected if he has no grounds under Jewish law for ending the marriage . However, the very fact that he files for divorce is likely to open up the whole issue of their relationship , which could in itself result in the parties reaching understanding and an agreement on divorce. Mutual consent is grounds of divorce under Jewish law.
Divorce – Preferred Strategy For Young Husband/Father
Question:
I am thinking of divorcing my wife. We are Jewish with young children. What is the best way for me to go about this to avoid paying high maintenance and avoiding a rougher deal financially regarding our property ?
Answer:
From a man’s viewpoint it is best to file for divorce at the rabbinical court. Custody is automatically tied to the plea, but a wife’s maintenance is only included if it is genuinely and correctly bound according to strict criteria. To include property the divorce plea must be both explicit and detailed about this. Any property not specifically mentioned will not be included in the plea.
If, however, the wife pre-empts the issue and files for child custody and maintenance for herself and the children and even takes certain steps regarding property at the family court, then the husband will be prevented from filing for these at the rabbinical court, which will then only have jurisdiction regarding the divorce.
As a rule, it is in the husband's interests for jurisdiction for proceedings regarding maintenance and property to be at the rabbinical court, while it is in the wife's interests for t hem to be at the family court.
Husband’s Options After Wife’s Maintenance Plea At Family Court
Question:
My wife has just filed a plea for maintenance against me at the family court. I am not sure whether I want to save the marriage or opt for divorce. Can I file for ‘shlom bayit’ or divorce at the rabbinical court after she has filed me for maintenance at the family court ?
Answer:
Yes, the fact that a wife files her husband for maintenance at the family court does not in any way stop him from either filing a plea to reconcile their marriage (‘shlom bayit’) or one to divorce, at the rabbinical court.
When Paying Maintenance After Divorce Is Recommended
Question:
In what circumstances might it beneficial to a man, who married his wife in the usual Jewish tradition, to pay her maintenance after they divorce?
Answer:
The general rule is that a Jewish husband who married in a Jewish religious wedding ceremony has an obligation to give his wife maintenance during their marriage. This obligation ends when they divorce. If a Jewish divorcee receives maintenance after her divorce this is an exception.
This exceptional situation can arise when the husband has an interest in persuading his wife to divorce as quickly as possible ( e.g. if he has a lover and she is pregnant and he wishes to marry her) and his wife is not so interested in divorce, or is not in a hurry to divorce. To tempt his wife to agree to divorce he may offer her a financial incentive – maintenance after the divorce.
Another situation where a woman may get maintenance after divorce is where there is a “balancing” or “equalization” of marital property between them and the husband owes the wife money. He may not be able to pay her a lump sum in which case the debt can be paid in the form of maintenance after divorce.
Wife’s Jewishness Unproved – Man's Tactics At Rabbinate
Question:
My wife has just filed me for divorce and maintenance at the rabbinical court. This seems peculiar to me because when we went to register for marriage at the rabbinical court, although she is registered as being Jewish in her Identity Card, the rabbinical court refused to register us for marriage because she could not produce the documentation required to prove she was a Jewess . We married in a civil ceremony in Cyprus. How should I react ?
Answer:
Where a Jewish husband is served with a plea for divorce which ties in his wife’s maintenance at the rabbinical court, and there is doubt as to her Jewishness, then he should claim that the rabbinical court lacks jurisdiction. He would be advised to do this in two ways – in his written defence pleadings and in a separate plea to the rabbinical court asking it to reject the divorce plea on the grounds that it has no jurisdiction because his wife is not Jewish. If the rabbinical court decides that it lacks jurisdiction to hear the divorce plea, then the maintenance plea – included in it – will fall, too.
Husband Cannot Dictate Jurisdiction Deal
Question:
Where a wife files for divorce can the husband condition his agreement at the hearing on his wife agreeing to transfer the plea for child maintenance to it from the family court ?
Answer:
No – this will not succeed according to a case decided in 2000 where during a divorce hearing at the rabbinical court the husband threatened to file for ‘Shlom Bayit’ if the wife did not agree to his demand to transfer the plea for child maintenance she had opened at the family court , and put it under the exclusive jurisdiction of the rabbinical court. It was held that the husband should divorce the wife immediately , without any conditions and that if he failed to appear at the divorce ceremony, or attend but refused to co-operate, restrictive orders would be made against him.
Husband’s Financial Incentive to Wife in Return For Divorce
Question:
Can a husband stuck in a stalemate because his wife will neither agree to save the marriage or end it, offer her a financial incentive in return for divorce – and get court endorsement for this ?
Answer:
Quite possibly, as occurred before Tel Aviv Family Court in December 2003 when the court turned down a maintenance plea filed by a wife – who would neither divorce or let her spouse return home – but also gave expression to the husband’s willingness to pay her money if she divorced. It said that if within 10 days she signed a joint application to divorce without any preconditions, attended a divorce hearing at the rabbinate and co-operated at the divorce ceremony, she would receive 36,000 N.I.S. maintenance in the form of “ adaptation money” for the year preceding the divorce – all because of her husband’s implied agreement to this.
Empty “Rebellious Wife” Claim Backfires
Question:
Can a husband prevent his wife gaining maintenance at the family court by filing for divorce at the rabbinate first, claim that she is “rebellious” and ask it to deny her financial support ?
Answer:
No ! The fact that a husband has filed for divorce first at the rabbinical court and included his wife’s maintenance in the plea does not necessarily mean he can prevent her from getting maintenance at the family court . She can still try and file there – and then if the husband objects and asks the family court to throw out her plea for lack of jurisdiction , it will then have to see whether the husband’s maintenance plea at the rabbinical court passed a tough 3-point test. For the rabbinical court to gain jurisdiction over the wife’s maintenance this way, the divorce plea must be filed in good faith, the maintenance plea must be bound to it in good faith , and properly, according to law.
In July 2003 a case involving a jurisdictional battle between Haifa Family Court and Haifa Rabbinical Court over a wife’s maintenance reached the Supreme Court . There it was finally decided that the family court had been correct in claiming that it had jurisdiction to hear the wife’s plea for her maintenance . It said the husband had not bound the issue to his divorce plea in good faith, but to stop her from having the subject discussed at the family court . He had made the empty claim , unsupported by evidence, that his wife was rebellious and had not supplied any data about finances .
False Accusations Cost Wife at Rabbinate
Question:
My wife has gone to the police with false claims about violence and is demanding her 'Ketuba' in return for her consent to divorce. I have not laid a hand on her. I want the divorce and she doesn't. Can she be made to divorce because of her behaviour ?
Answer:
In theory this is possible , depending on developments. For example,in December 2006 the Greater Rabbinical Court turned down a wife's appeal against the Haifa Rabbinical Court's ruling obliging her to divorce because of her false accusations against her husband about assault and rape. It further held that she had no right to her "Ketuba", maintenance, compensation or property.
The wife had complained to the police that her husband had attacked and raped her, but later went back on this, with Haifa District Court passing judgment proclaiming his innocence in criminal proceedings brought against him . The Greater Rabbinical Court backed up the first level judgment and held that the wife had ulterior financial motives – but the issue of money should come after matters of the soul. She had demanded 500,000 NIS for her 'consent' to divorce.
"In cases like this, where the wife makes very serious allegations against the husband, while refusing to accept a 'get' without conditions, we recommend first that the divoce be carried out immediately, and after the 'get' we will decide on monetary matters", The Greater Rabbinical Court held.
Husband Wrongly "Grounded" in Israel – Costs & Damages
Question:
Can a husband against whom a 'stop order' was "wrongly" granted as part of rabbinical court proceedings - after his wife deliberately told lies - get his own back so that she suffers for her folly ?
Answer:
Yes ! Firstly, the rabbinical court can order costs against a wife who gains a 'stop order' against her husband on false grounds – due to lies, spite, malice or pettiness. Incidentally, if a stop order is wrongly granted against a husband by the family court as part of proceedings between them there, due to the wife's lies, spite, malice or pettiness, it can also order costs against her.
Secondly, if , as a result of the 'stop order' the husband incurred damages – he can consider bringing a civil damages suit against her for financial compensation for damage caused as a result of the order granted against him.
Husband's Appeal Against Wife's Maintenance
Question :
If a husband appeals against a family court ruling awarding his wife maintenance, can he gain tactically by preventing her from enforcing the decision at the bailiff's meanwhile ?
Answer:
No, not as a rule ! If a husband appeals at the district court against a family court judgment or temporary decision awarding his wife maintenance this will not, in itself, prevent her taking action to enforce it at the bailiff's court if he does not pay up meanwhile. This is because as long as there is no judicial decision delaying implementation of the judgment /decision awarding the wife maintenance, then it is still enforceable, and the mere filing of an appeal against it by the husband, will not prevent the wife opening a file at the bailiff's to get the maintenance she has been awarded.
No Conditioning Divorce Upon Reimbursement of Maintenance
Question:
If a wife is declared “ rebellious” by a rabbinical court can the husband condition his consent to divorce upon his wife reimbursing him for all the maintenance he paid her ?
Answer:
No ! The Greater Rabbinical Court accepted an appeal by a wife against her husband’s conditioning of divorce upon her giving him back maintenance he had paid her. After the district rabbinical court had declared the wife “ rebellious” , the husband had said he would only divorce her if she gave him back a substantial sum of maintenance which he had paid her over the years following litigation she had brought in the civil system. It accepted the husband’s action but the wife won on appeal.
The Greater Rabbinical Court held it was clear that the couple, who had lived separately for over 10 years, should divorce, but said it was very hard to understand the district court ruling allowing the husband to condition his consent to end their marriage upon the return of the maintenance sums. The money had been used to support the wife and there was no justification for its return , especially given the extreme violence within the marriage. As both sides were interested in divorce, it held that they must divorce immediately, without reference to the question of returning maintenance money, which should be dealt with afterwards. It ordered the wife to produce two guarantors.
Marriage Reconciliation Plea Delays House Sale
Question:
My wife has filed for divorce at the rabbinical court and for the division of our property at the family court, including our home . If I file for marital reconciliation at the rabbinical court, could this help me to keep a roof over my head ?
Answer:
Yes, according to a decision given by Rishon LeZion Family Court in February 2007, when it ordered a delay in dividing partnership in the marital home following developments at the rabbinical court related to marital reconciliation plea filed by the husband. He had filed for 'Shalom Bayit' (literally "peace at home") at the rabbinical court . Accordingly, it granted an order forbidding the wife from interfering with his specific accommodation in the marital home. Furthermore, it held that without a home there can be no "peace at home", and, therefore, the apartment could not be sold.
Recent amendments to Israeli legislation in November 2008 concerning the division of marital property are designed to reduce financial manipulation in divorce negotiations . Under the old law , relating to couples marrying after 1.1.74, division of marital assets was normally only effected upon divorce or death. Recent amendments allow for the division of marital property before divorce, in certain specified conditions. See Property Rights – Couples Married After 1974.
Divorcing Husband Forbidden From Forcing Wife's Abortion
Question:
My wife and I are in the process of divorcing at the rabbinate. We have just discovered she is pregnant. Can I – or the rabbinical court – force her to have an abortion because we are getting divorced ?
Answer:
No! A husband has no right to force his wife to have an abortion ,whether or not they are in the middle of divorce proceedings. There is no connection between the two.
Wriggling Out of "Exhorbitant" Ketuba
Question:
Can a husband be "let off" his Ketuba if it is "exhorbitant"?
Answer:
In theory this is possible, but very rare and in principle a rabbinical court will regard a "Ketuba" as a "finished bond or bill " or clear debt that does not proving, to which the wife is entitled upon divorce, unless she is declared "rebellious" and loses her entitlement to it. If the husband disputes it, the burden of proof lies with him . In a case decided by Netanya Rabbinical Court in October 2006, a husband was unable to prove that a Ketuba to the tune of a million Shekels as being "exhorbitant". He admitted that he had given his previous wife her Ketuba of $ 200,000 , close to a million shekels. He was ordered to pay his wife's Ketuba of 1,000,000 Shekels which it held was not "exhorbitant".
Adulterous Wife To Pay Husband's Divorce Costs
Question:
Can a husband whose wife has committed adultery be made to shoulder the financial burden of divorce proceedings at the rabbinate ?
Answer:
Possibly, if the husband proves adultery at the rabbinical court , it orders her to divorce on the basis of this, and he requests that she be ordered to foot the bill. In September 2006 the Greater Rabbinical Court upheld a costs order made against an adulterous wife by Netanya Rabbinical Court. She had been ordered to pay her husband's legal fees in proving her adultery and his entitlement to divorce, as well as the paying for the cost of the private detective he hired to produce the necessary evidence.
tel: 03-5234133, 077-3500000
fax: 03-5232251